Hair Trauma
By Art Jannicelli

My eyes are bleary and unfocused as I put the phone receiver to my ear and automatically say, “Inreach Internet this is Art, how can I help you”?

“Did I wake you”? said a female caller.

“No it’s only 5:30am and we are a 24/7 call center. So how can I help you”? I replied rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

“My internet keeps disconnecting me.’ Said the caller.

“Let me just get your account information so I can look up your service and look into your problem” I replied.

“My name is Debbie and my email is Debbie@ inreach.com” said Debbie.

“Well Debbie from what I see here you here you are getting disconnected every 6 hours. Inreach’s policy is to disconnect customers every 6 hours.” I replied.

“How am I supposed to download all of my Mp3’s if I keep getting disconnected?” said Debbie.

“Well I see you are located in Eureka California and frankly I think you are very fortunate to only be disconnected every 6 hours and seem to have high connection speeds. If you like I can setup your computer to redial as soon as it is disconnected”,

“Let’s do that then” Said Debbie.

So we spent the next few minutes setting up the auto-reconnect.

“Well Debbie you should be all set now, is there anything else I can help you with”? I said.

“Nope, you have a good day”. Said Debbie.

“You too Debbie, I am going to watch your connection after you hang up to be sure you are okay”.

Debbie immediately screamed into the phone, “OH MY GOD YOU CAN SEE MY HAIR!” and promptly hung up.